Post-Bariatric Surgery: How Might Your Relationships Change?

Bariatric surgery is a significant, life-changing event that brings challenges and outcomes that can be hard to predict. You likely made the decision to undergo surgery because you were unhappy with your self-image, and it was affecting your health. But it’s important to recognize that the people around you—those who know you as you were before surgery—may also experience changes in how they relate to you post-surgery.

The reality is, relationships are the lifeblood of human existence. Humans are social beings, and our relationships, both with others and ourselves, drive factors like happiness, self-image, confidence, and how we view the world. It’s essential to be mentally prepared for potential challenges in these interpersonal relationships that may arise with your transformation.

The Relationship You Have with Yourself

This may be the most important relationship to foster. The way you view yourself is like an internal dictionary of labels and definitions that shape how you see your place in the world. Before surgery, you may have looked in the mirror and seen someone you didn’t like. Even after significant weight loss and improved health, it can be difficult to break free from the mindset that you’re “never going to be enough.”

According to a study by Ashleigh Pona from the Department of Psychology at the University of Kansas, “adults with obesity who report symptoms of depression, anxiety, disordered eating, and negative body image often continue to struggle with body image dissatisfaction in the months after undergoing bariatric surgery” (Kansas University).

Here’s how you can foster a healthier relationship with yourself post-surgery:

• Practice positive affirmations and engage in daily self-talk that focuses on your achievements and strengths.
• Connect with others who have had bariatric surgery and share strategies for building confidence and self-image going forward.
• Stay active. Continue exercising, eating healthy, and doing things that build you up. Laziness can fuel negativity—don’t let yourself go there.
• Consider therapy. Sometimes, one-on-one sessions with a therapist can help you work through lingering feelings of self-doubt or negativity.

The Relationship You Have with Your Significant Other

The relationship with your significant other is vital, as this person is likely the one you spend the most time with. Their opinion likely matters deeply to you, and how they see you can impact how you view yourself. The difficulty comes when your new post-surgery appearance alters the image your partner had of you. This change, though no fault of your own, can lead your partner to feel insecure, inadequate, or even unnecessary.

According to the LA Times, a Swedish study found that “obese people who had a spouse or live-in partner and underwent weight loss surgery were 28% more likely to become separated or divorced compared to those who didn’t have surgery” (LA Times).

Here are some tips to navigate potential challenges with your significant other post-surgery:

• Seek relationship counseling. A counselor can help you both understand and prepare for changes in your relationship post-surgery.
• Keep the communication lines open. Regularly discuss how you’re both feeling and share any concerns or emotions you’re experiencing post-surgery.

Relationships with Friends and Family

Matthew Kelly, author of The Rhythm of Life, wisely says: “The people we surround ourselves with either raise or lower our standards. They either help us become the best version of ourselves or encourage us to become lesser versions. We all need people in our lives who raise our standards, remind us of our essential purpose, and challenge us to become the best version of ourselves.”

Post-surgery, friends or family members might carry guilt for allowing you to reach the point where surgery became necessary, and they may struggle to adapt to the "new" you.

Here’s how to maintain healthy relationships with friends and family:

• Communicate openly about your goals and expectations after surgery. Let them know what kind of support you need.
• Remind them that your surgery was about your health, not about changing for them.
• Evaluate the relationships that encouraged unhealthy habits. If someone in your life continues to be a negative influence, it may be time to distance yourself from that relationship. Surrounding yourself with positive influences enables personal growth and lasting change.

Conclusion

Bariatric surgery is more than just a physical transformation—it can affect your mental and emotional well-being and the relationships you hold dear. By focusing on building a healthy relationship with yourself, keeping communication strong with your significant other, and fostering positive connections with friends and family, you can navigate these changes successfully.

Don’t forget that taking a quality multivitamin is essential to maintaining your health post-surgery. Vita4Life! Multivitamins provide the key vitamins and minerals needed to support your new lifestyle. Make Vita4Life! Multivitamins a part of your daily health regimen today!